A big pile of sh!t

Some days things start of right and you feel a calm and peace with the world. Some days you walk outside and step in a big pile of dog crap. And then you have to spend 10 minutes scraping it off your shoe because you don’t have another pair to wear to work. And you can’t just leave it because it stinks like, well, shit and people are going to look at you and begin to ask, “hey, what the hell is that smell, is that dog crap?”. And you can’t drive to work with it and smear it all over the carpeting and make the whole car stink. But then, the more you wipe your feet in the grass the more you tear up the lawn and now your shoe is not just covered in poop, but dirt as well. So you go into the garage and look for something you can work between the shoe tread so you can clean it out. And low and behold there isn’t a damn screwdriver to be found, or a stick, or a hook, or a pencil, or paperclip or anything useful for the job. So you settle on an allen wrench and begin to work it out. All the while the garage door is up and the neighbors are probably watching and wondering what the hell you’re doing. Or maybe they know and those stupid bastards are just sitting behind their curtains laughing and pointing like they always do, becase you know damn well and good everyone is always laughing behind your back.

Yeah, sometimes things start off that way.


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